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Truth Telling

I guess this week is “blogging reflection week” for me.  Anniversaries, even blogging anniversaries, require reflection don’t they? I hope you’ll bear with me and keep reading.

After my last post where I went on more than a bit about how grateful I am for the whole new world that has opened up to me through blogging, I couldn’t stop thinking about the down side of blogging as well, or perhaps it should more appropriately be called, the reality side.

I couldn’t stop thinking how in some ways it would be so much easier to write a blog about cooking, or gardening, or movies, or photography or just about anything else. It would be kind of nice just to worry about what delicious or healthy recipes to post next, what movie to review, what flower to contemplate planting in the spring or what book to read next week.

It would be kind of nice to not deal with life and death stuff.

But, of course, life and death stuff does exit in the world of cancer, so likewise these topics exist in the cancer blogosphere as well. We cancer bloggers will and do pretty much tackle any issue, the good, the bad and the ugly. And some of it is pretty darn ugly.

People do suffer from debilitating side effects of treatments and surgeries. People do suffer broken and even lost relationships resulting from a cancer diagnosis. People do experience recurrences. People do live with fear and uncertainty. People do suffer from depression. People do get sick, really sick. People do get worse. People do, in fact, die.

In this one short year since I’ve been blogging there have been too many losses. Too many voices have been silenced by cancer in one year. Three voices I miss are Daria’s, The Carcinista’s and Ashley: Warrior Mom’s

My point here is not to be a proclaimer of gloom and doom; no, quite the contrary. In spite of all the difficulties, no in spite of all the tragedies, there continues to be more wit, humor, wisdom and yes, laughter found in the breast cancer blogosphere than one might ever expect.

We don’t just share the ugly stuff; we share about anything and everything. And some of it is good, really good!

As a result of all this sharing, I’m reminded not to feel sorry for myself when I look at my reflection in the mirror each morning while trying not to cringe at the face that looks back at me now. I’m reminded I’m not the only one with a weak arm, chronic pain, an unsightly crop of unruly hair, a puffy-looking/feeling face and a forever altered body. Mostly, I’m reminded I’m not alone.

I’m reminded about a lot of things. I’m also inspired.

I’m inspired on a daily basis by countless others who speak the truth about this crazy world of breast cancer. That’s what I’m trying to do too,  speak the truth.

We are not nay sayers or pessimists, though we have been called both (and worse). 

No, we are realists, (at least that’s what I call myself), and every person’s unique cancer reality is validated and accepted. At least this is true in my ever-expanding blogging circle.

Validation, acceptance and the truth inspire me way more than all those pink ribbons and images depicting what proper cancer survivorship is supposed to look like.

So, despite the down-side, despite the difficulties, despite the losses, despite the dying, it’s still a pretty darn amazing arena I find myself in on a daily basis.

Who would have thought?

Who or what inspires you?



Tuesday 13th of September 2011

Nancy, this was a great post. People who are brave inspire me; be it cancer, or some other crap they're dealing with. Be brave.


Wednesday 14th of September 2011

Lisa, Glad you liked the post, Lisa. Thanks for letting me know your thoughts.


Tuesday 13th of September 2011

Nancy, you are way too critical and hard on yourself! I saw a recent picture of you and your short hair is darling and you are as beautiful as ever. And don't you forget that. Great post as usual, and anyone who is coping with difficulties in this world is an inspiration. Especially brave ones like you.


Wednesday 14th of September 2011

Betty, You are very kind, but darling is not a word I would use to describe my hair. ha! Thanks for your nicely worded comments!

Jan Hasak

Monday 12th of September 2011

Nancy, great post! I can't imagine myself without this great group of bloggers who inspire me with the truth of their convictions. I'm inspired by strong women who stand up for what they believe is right, even in the face of opposition or ridicule. They walk the talk. They are honest, brutally at times, when expressing their thoughts. Pink is not the answer, only a convenient color that is colorizing the truth. XOXO, Jan


Monday 12th of September 2011

Jan, I am so glad to see you back. I've missed your comments, but I totally understand why you've needed to step back. Truth and honesty are always things to strive for and not just in regard to breast cancer. Sadly, you know that better than most. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts.

Monday 12th of September 2011

This amazing group of women I find myself in is my breast cancer reality. We're not fixated on pink, we don't judge one another, we just listen. My blogging sisters are one of the richest facets of my life. I can't imagine my life without all of you.

XOXOXO, Brenda


Monday 12th of September 2011

Brenda, I'm with you all the way. Thanks for sharing.

Ana Marie

Sunday 11th of September 2011

truth is a beautiful thing.. there is so much i regret not saying to my dad before he passed and i also regret him not being able to simply say "this sucks".. i get that people try to hide the "ugly" truth.. but in that ugliness comes a feeling of knowing you are trusted completely and that the other person knows you will take that truth and just listen without judgement... great post! (i am just now catching up because i can not figure out how to follow or subscribe)


Monday 12th of September 2011

Ana Marie, Don't beat yourself up about things you did or did not say to your dad. I'm sure he knew how you felt about him and that's what matters. I know what you mean about allowing the cancer patient the freedom to say "this sucks." You can't gloss over cancer's ugly side and you are exactly right about the person hearing those truths being willing to listen and not judge. Thanks so much for commenting.

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