Welcome to my first blog post! Publishing it was pretty scary. But I did it. I decided to share about my breast cancer experience via a blog. As a writer, I am compelled to write about it. I tell myself every day it’s the reason I got breast cancer – so my writing about it could somehow benefit others in this mess.
Otherwise, what is the point of it all?
My experience as a first-hand observer of my mother’s breast cancer experience and now facing it myself, gives me a unique perspective, one I never wanted or thought I would have. But here I am.
I should probably briefly summarize my recent diagnosis. The details will come later. My lump was found accidentally on April 19, 2010 when I went to the ER of my local hospital thinking I was having a heart attack. I was wrong. Very wrong.
A diagnostic mammogram was quickly scheduled, followed by a biopsy, brca test and bilateral mastectomy. Surgery also included the beginning of the reconstruction process and most recently, I began the most dreaded part of all so far, chemotherapy.
Since the calendar now says September, cancer has already eaten up a good chunk of my family’s life this year. September also shouts, back to school, but this year I will set aside my substitute teacher’s hat and instead concentrate on this blog as well as finishing my memoir titled, Losing My Mother and Then My Breasts.
My goal is to post twice a week. I intend to devote two or three whole days a week just to writing, something that will be both a luxury and a challenge. Other days I will need to take care of the more mundane things like laundry and cleaning and oh yeah, chemo and countless more doctor appointments. I admire people who continue to hold down real jobs while undergoing cancer treatment. Cancer seems to be my job now.
When you have cancer, I have discovered you can’t plan too much. Sometimes, just going to the grocery store feels like a trip to the moon.
I live on a lake in western Wisconsin. I am married, have three grown children, a golden retriever and an English springer spaniel. Besides spending time with my family, writing when I can and teaching, I also like to read, garden, tinker on the piano, walk my dogs and go to movies.
Again, welcome to my blog. I hope it will be a good resource for others thrust into this darn cancer maze. Maybe we can help each other find our way around.
Besides the darn cancer, what brought you here to my blog?
Mary Ireland
Wednesday 19th of April 2023
Hi, Nancy,
I found your blog after reading your memoir Cancer is not a gift and it didn't make me a better person.
I was sorry to read about the death of your mother. My husband died in March of 2020.Such losses are etched in our bones. We don't "move on," as we are urged to do by society, but as humans, we are designed to move forward.
My husband, Chuck, was never one to shy away from discussing difficult or supposedly taboo subjects like death. Everyone in the family knew what he thought about it. His one wish was that I would be with him, holding his hand when he died.
Chuck got his wish. We were lucky. He died just before Covid lockdown, which robbed so many people of the ability to share their loved one's last moments.
I was diagnosed with breast cancer in October of last year and had a mastectomy and a lumpectomy on Jan. 6th. Everything I read about reconstruction, how long it took, and how it might have to be redone after radiation, unnerved me. I chose not to do it.
When a nurse explained to me that a mastectomy generally is outpatient surgery because a breast is not an organ like a kidney or lung, I was shocked. I was about to have a body part amputated and she made it sound as minor as having a skin tag removed.
Thank you for writing your memoir. It was comforting to me that someone else had similar thoughts about so many things related to breast cancer.
I was able to sidestep chemotherapy, but I just finished radiation and will be starting five years of hormone therapy. You are so right that breast cancer isn't ever over. It is a haunting spectre, unseen and largely unsuspected by those around us. But we know it is there.
Thank you, Nancy,
Mary
Nancy
Thursday 20th of April 2023
Mary, I'm glad you found my blog, and I'm so pleased my memoir resonated. I'm so sorry about your husband, and I'm grateful he got that wish. You are so right about the losses being etched into our bones. We do move forward, but on, I don't think so. I'm also sorry you've had to deal with breast cancer as well. Your decision to opt out of reconstruction is totally understandable, reasonable, and right for you. Breast cancer is downplayed as not being that bad, so the nurse's comment you mentioned doesn't surprise me. I'm glad you've now finished up radiation. Good luck with the hormone therapy. For some, it's rough. I managed to get stick it out. Thanks so much for your comments. And again, a big welcome to you!
Lisa
Tuesday 11th of January 2011
Nancy, I love your blog! I'm so glad you found my rant re: forgiveness and left a post so I could, in turn, find you! You sound like an amazing woman, and I'm so glad we're becoming friends. I'm going to put you in my blog subscriptions so when you have a new post, I can receive it. Thanks! :-) Lisa
Nancy
Tuesday 11th of January 2011
Lisa, Thanks for checking out my blog and leaving such a nice comment. It just shows once again how welcoming this community is. I look forward to reading more of your posts.
Teresa
Monday 20th of September 2010
Nancy, I'm so glad you found my blog and lead me to yours. I look forward to following your writing. Best of luck in your battle. I'm 1 year and 8 months past diagnosis and with "no evidence of disease." And yes, my beagle is 5 years out and clearly an inspirational survivor!
Nancy
Friday 24th of September 2010
Teresa, Thanks for taking time to find my blog. It seems we have some common interests in writing and dogs! I look forward to following your writing as well.
Suzette Lipscomb
Monday 20th of September 2010
Hi Nancy, I think this is an amazing idea and great theraputic way for you to deal with both your ongoing treatment and the sadness and loss. I have not found the time finish my memoir, but LOVE the title of yours.
I might be ahead of myself here because I haven't read all your posts, but I am sure we share a lot of similar experiences.
One of the things I always try and do is something special for myself on the anniversary of my dad's death. The routine varies, but I always acknowledge how much I miss him and try to nurture myself in some way - with quiet time, a present, a trip, just a beach walk even.
I read today an article about how there are some studies showing that after someone dies, your risk of being diagnosed increases. I can tell you that a few years after my dad's death, I was diagnosed the first time and a year after my grandfather's death, I was diagnosed a second time. I would hate to think that every time someone dies, I get cancer! But I do think we had a really close family and that stress played a role in my own journey.
I wish you so many things, but mostly an easy course of treatment, time for yourself during this experience and the love of family and friends who know exactly what you need.
In good health,
Suzette Lipscomb
Nancy
Friday 24th of September 2010
Suzette, Thanks for checking out my blog. I really appreciate it. I hope you'll become a regular visitor. I enjoy reading yours. It seems we have some common experiences. Thanks for the good wishes as well.
Pat Hayden Hartman
Friday 17th of September 2010
Hi Nancy, Julie Halvorson shared your site with me. I am an oncology nurse at New Ulm so have an upfront dealing with cancer and treat many friends as well as relatives (my brother recently completed chemo for colon cancer). It definitely is a life-changing moment when you get the diagnosis and a journey of a super duper rollercoaster ride along the way. Hopefully you will have the love and support of your treatment team and have as much smiles and giggles as possible while sitting in "the chair"!!! Anything I can help with please let me know. You go girl!!! and please say hi to David for me--it's been a lonnngggg time. Pat
Nancy
Sunday 19th of September 2010
Pat, Thanks for visiting my blog and for your supportive comments. As an oncology nurse you certainly have lots of experience with all this stuff. If you feel my blog could be of help to any of your breast cancer patients, please pass the info along as I would really love to open up dialogue with other cancer patients. I hope your brother is doing well. I passed your greeting on to David. He says helllo as well.