Another birthday has come and gone for me. I’ve now begun the next decade of my life. I won’t tell you which decade, but if you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you probably know or could figure it out if you wanted to and I’m pretty sure no one cares that much to investigate, so my “secret’s” probably safe. Growing older is not something that bothers me much, well, not too much anyway. I fully realize how many young women and men in Cancer-land have not had or will not have the privilege of this thing we call aging. Old age, aging period, now that is a gift. Cancer no way.
It’s now been eleven years since cancer barged into my mother’s life and therefore into mine as well. Cancer made its grand entrance on my birthday no less. It’s a cruel reminder every year and just one more reason to hate the beast, cancer not my birthday. I should have called this post I wrote a while back, “the Uninvited Intruder” instead of the “Uninvited Guest”. That would be oh-so-much-more appropriate. I’ve thought about changing the title, but I haven’t edited old posts I’ve written much for some reason, but I’m not sure what that reason is.
Occasionally I read articles, blog posts, letters and such at various sites (it’s meant to be some sort of good mental exercise or something) in which the author writes to her/his younger self. In these kinds of writings you’re supposed to give that younger version of you some advice, tidbits of wisdom or whatever you want. I have started to write such a piece a few times and then stopped because the truth is; I have no idea what I would tell that girl I was. Not like it matters, but it is interesting to think about.
What would I say to her?
Would I let her in on the cancer secret, my cancer secret, ‘her’ cancer secret?
Keep in mind; in my case as a brca+ person, had I known at a younger age about this cancer thing, I could have possibly done things differently. So the answer for me is a bit more complex, or is it?
So my question to you, my dear readers, is this:
Cancer or no cancer, if you could have a chat with your younger self or write her/him a letter, what would you say?
If applicable, would you tell that young person (you) that cancer was in her/his future some day?
Is knowledge, granted in this case pretend knowledge, always a good thing?
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